May I have this dance?

It was Friday morning and Bev and I were getting ready for work at the same time. We usually have very different schedules first thing in the morning. Since Bev has been successfully turning herself into a hard body, many mornings she has been getting up at 4 o'dark to get to the Y. She looks Marvelous.

I have been getting up at 5:00 to journal and meditate and sometimes ponder the blog subject for the week. So even when Bev sleeps in for a little while, we often miss one another first thing in the morning. Friday was different though. The fates and the desperate need for a little more sleep conspired so that we both hit our alarms at 6:00. Each of us awake with our inner stopwatches being set for a departure time of 6:45. We would be cutting it close.

Thankfully, I started my plumbing tasks with 3 intact showers (see last week's blog), So even with my incompetence, we still have two working. We engaged in synchronized tooth brushing, looking over shoulders to comb hair and to apply make-up (Bev, not me), packing the work bags and off to the kitchen.  I was popping the toast in the toaster. Bev was pouring a bowl of twigs and nuts (marvelous looking hard body that she is). Time to feed the dogs, then circling the island; putting together a sack lunch. 6:43 we were turning off the lights and a quick hug heading out the door. Ladies and gentlemen start your engines and we were off.

It struck me then that I had just been a partner in a beautiful dance. Maybe rushed and hurried with no time to stop and smell the roses, but a carefully choreographed piece a art none the less. Some dances have the frenetic pace of Swing and some have the structured cadence of a waltz.

There have been times in the past when we have taken more time and probably said more words but were more out of step than during our Friday two step. So often, only the partners know the missteps and even then there is self deception.

I was out in the front yard doing some gardening yesterday and was watching a couple go by on some very nice bicycles. He was about 25 yards ahead cranking along and I heard her exclaim, "look at the flowers." A beat or two passed and he was oblivious.

She exclaimed again "look at the flowers."  He looked over and said "yeah, pretty" They were dancing. I have no idea of how well they were dancing. It is usually impossible to tell how well others dance. I have created a half dozen different scenarios filled with the nuances of what might have been. But no matter how fluid and in step they may or may not have been, they were dancing. They were moving along and in her strength she noticed something beautiful and of intrinsic value that he was missing. She called him to it and allowed it into his life.

We have numerous nieces and nephews and two children at various stages of choosing their dance partners. I remember that part of the dance for Bev and I well. Which is why I offer no advice. I remember that I knew it all and that our love was singular and pure in its intensity and devotion. How we survived that to have a love that has flourished into what it is now; the eve of our 26th anniversary; I do not know. I know that we have stepped on toes, zigged when we should have zagged, fought for the lead position and some times been dancing completely different dances. Yet in spite of those missteps or maybe because of them, we love and are loved.

To my children and nieces and nephews I wish for you the blessing of a safe dance floor; a place to step on toes, to learn how to lead and follow in accordance to your strengths and weaknesses and the perseverance to keep practicing; a blessed marriage.

To that guy on the bike; if you are reading this, they were dark red peonies. The next step is yours.

Take care.

Roger